On dating sites what to say in a message

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Apart from countless “best openers for ultimate good time fun success”, which may work a few times until everybody is sick of reading the same thing from half of their matches, there is surely more popular texting advice we could examine, but instead, here’s what I suggest: I also once googled “tinder first message”. I tried to figure out who I was, so that I could be myself.

When what I should have been doing was just writing whatever came to mind. Pointing out, or asking about an actual common interest I saw in their profile, but usually not as a first message. Yes, it’s brought me a 50% (non-bot) response rate, resulting in some of the best conversations and dates I’ve had on/from Tinder.

Which may explain why I had unusually good conversations following this canned opener, from those matches that did reply.

If you have misgivings about copy paste messages, either sending or receiving, I understand completely. Feel free to leave a comment below, or visit the Swipe Helper Subreddit.

Even in terms of generalized online dating messaging advice I prefer it to the above.

It just doesn’t seem to make writing that dreaded first message any easier.

So you’ve matched with someone spectacular on Tinder (or Bumble), or maybe just anyone at all, and now you’re racking your brain trying to come up with a conversation starter befitting of this momentous occasion.

Or maybe you’ve seen poor response rates in the past, and you’re looking to improve your openers. So let me tell you: Doesn’t exist, because tastes, preferences and opinions of the people you’ve swiped on are as varied as those faces flying left and right. When adhering strictly to this MO, you also run the danger of starting an interview instead of a conversation. Another disadvantage, apart from not exactly sticking out from the crowd is how time intensive it can be to find something to reference.

Welcome to our reviews of the what to say in an online dating message (also known as thailand present).

Because so many people think name puns are the best possible opener, and even ask the internet to help with pun ideas for various names, you can bet Alisha has already read something about putting a leash on her before and won’t be particularly impressed.

I’d even wager she didn’t find it all that funny the first time. Unless you are a true virtuoso in the art of puns, and manage to strike a nerve and elicit a positive response with some reliability, I would recommend leaving the puns to just such masters. I tried my best to reference things in their profile, even if I didn’t find anything that interested me. Looking back, it seems obvious that such matches (and dates) were doomed to fail.

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