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The compliments we deflected, the things we said and didn’t, and the embraces we offered or withheld.It all connects to how well or poorly we were aligned with our inner knowing.And to the mindful dater, being clear and present is the end goal in any situation. He was in his thirties and I was in my early twenties at the time and woefully unprepared for anything approaching serious commitment. No two ways about it: being clear about your romantic intentions makes you vulnerable to rejection. The last time I saw Joe was the night he dropped me.Who needs mystery, confusion and ambiguity when clarity is so much… In case you’re feeling a twinge of resistance to the idea of asserting yourself romantically, rest assured that, even for as uncomfortable as it may seem, it’s a skill well worth acquiring. He told me very clearly that he wanted a serious relationship with someone who was available in every way and that he didn’t need any more friends. Joe was classy and direct, and he did us both a favor in the process.When you meet someone you’re interested in, get acquainted with your inner Sassy Girl, smile, flirt a little and let him know you like him.Chances are, he’ll appreciate your approach, and if he doesn’t, it’s his loss.The thing about Given that the very definition of romance has its own range of interpretation and meaning, it only makes sense that we’d each define it differently too.
It’s also easy to roll right past any warning signs that are flashing gently by the side of the road.Learning to listen deeply to our innate wisdom is a skill, and it grows weak the less we use it.Perhaps we tell ourselves we won’t repeat the same mistakes again, or, conversely, we congratulate ourselves on some choice we made long ago in the name of love.Impress him by having an idea of what you want to do, suggests Nick Notas on his Dating Specialist website. ”In all dating-related matters, your safety should be your first concern.Rather than saying, “You pick what we’ll do,” tell him, “I’d like to go see that new art exhibit,” or “That new dog park is pretty cool. If a new guy says he’ll pick you up at your condo, nix that and tell him you’ll meet him in a public area, such as at a coffee shop or restaurant.